Where I just want to knife myself, as my baby sis would say…..
Where I just want to knife myself, as my baby sis would say…..
So this past weekend, Honorary Brother in Law (HBIL), came in from Vancouver for a visit because it was his brothers’ and my sisters’, Middlechildadvice\’s Blog , birthday bash celebration. We had a great time celebrating everyone’s birthdays and hanging out with the various family members.
However, I was less than pleased to see HBIL because we weren’t really on speaking terms.
Why you ask?
Well, HBIL had the audacity to tell me that he went to a Britney Spear’s Concert and basically sat so close to the stage he could have touched her (he is a closet Britney fan AND he works for the radio) and DID NOT TAKE ME! Then he puts all these amazing pictures up on his facebook page, just to rub it in my face. RUDE, right?
Me: I am not talking to you or listening to you on the radio anymore.
HBIL: I would have invited you, BUT I didn’t think you had a passport.
Me: I HAVE a passport.
HBIL (smiling craftily): Oh……well……. I did get you a present.
Me (clearly SUPER EXCITED): OMG, what is it? Did you get me her autograph?
HBIL: No better……..
Me: Well, what is it?
HBIL: (pulling out something slowly and dramatically on purpose)
Me: What is this?
HBIL: It is a piece of confetti from Britney’s concert, but not just ANY piece of confetti, this piece Britney actually LOOKED at…while it dropped from the sky and I grabbed one for you …knowing you would treasure it always!
And that dear readers, is why I am no longer mad at HBIL. For now.
So, it isn’t like I have a problem or anything, but I noticed that so far this entire week I have guzzled no, eh downed, no drank some sort of liquor beverage every night. Not that there is anything wrong with that, right?
I have determined that work causes me to drink. But, that is a different story for a different day. So, I come home after a hard day of work and Hubby pours me a nice glass of Crown and Coke. Yea, I am a whiskey, beer, wine, you name it, I will drink it gal. Judge away.
I think I am totally cool downing my whiskey, that is until I get a text from a friend.
Friend: You drunk yet?
Me: No, but I am drinking coke and Crown.
Friend: You are so classy.
Me: Don’t be jealous
But, I am right? I mean, I am classy and lady-like. That is why Hubby likes me, right? (BELCH).
Or is it cause he thinks he will get lucky?
P.S. Hubby oftens suffers from spouts of delusion, especially when I have a drink in hand. (BRRPPP)
Is it strange that for the second morning in a row, I woke up on the floor next to the bed? How did I get there? I don’t remember it. Meanwhile, looked up to find Patches, the dog with her head on my pillows, snoring, and sprawled out like a person on MY side of the bed. Then, under further examination, I find Hubby snuggling up to her, with his arm around her belly.
Clearly, I have been replaced by the dog. I think this is a conspiracy. I think I have been ousted. Evil BED HOG. How is she doing this? And HOW does Hubby not realize that he is snuggling up to a big, hairy beast?
I am not big or hairy …..nor a beast. At least I don’t think.
Stupid Bed Hog.
I think it is time for a bigger bed. Or maybe I should just get my OWN bed. Yea, I like that idea better. 🙂
So, this morning I had to get up to drive to a different office. I dread going to this office because it is FAR. But, I had Britney going and I thought it wouldn’t be so bad, I even left the house 10 minutes earlier than I needed to. There I am driving along, and singing to Britney when I encounter it.
And no, I am not exaggerating. I tried pinching myself, hoping I was in some kind of disasterous-traffic-induced nightmare. But, I was definately awake. The on-ramp to the highway I usually get on is closed. Thus explaining the huge disaster on the off ramp and side streets. I am stuck. There is no where else to go, except sit in the maddening traffic. Everyone is pissed, driving terribly, and honking on their horns. It was horrible. And that is when I started sweating.
There was no way to avoid it. I was getting TMS (traffic madness syndrome). Before I knew it, I had all the symptoms:
*full force anger
*tired, achey muscles from stamping on the breaks
*lack ot control
*middle finger uncontrollableness
So, instead of taking me maybe 45 minutes to an hour to get here…it took me one hour and 25 minutes exactly! At least it is Friday! I am scared to think how long it will take me to get home tonight. I have a feeling it is going to be a LOOOOONNNNNGGGGG day.
I definately have a case of full on TMS. I wonder if they make something for this? You know, some pill or something? If so, I NEED it. Actually, I know just the thing that will help get me through the day…..
Lunch at Jersey Mike’s! I am starting to feel better already!
It’s just been one of those weeks. Filled with stress and lack of sleep and now it has compounded where any little thing feels like it will set me off.
Like what? Well, let me start the list:
1. There is never anything “good” for dinner. We have no food and are poor. I hate grocery shopping and yea, sure Hubby tries to “find” stuff to make out of nothing in our fridge, but I am just tired of eating the same old frozen pizza dinners. So then Hubby gets mad at me because I don’t like anything he suggests. JERK.
2. My middle sister asks me if I am PMSing since I am being a “a jerk.” Whatever, maybe I am, but I don’t feel overtaken by the crazy, chocolate monsters yet…so maybe I am not. JERK
3. I decide to go to bed early, in the hopes that IF i get enough sleep I will wake up happier, excited to go to work (yea, right) and get more done. But, instead I am awoken in hour by the youngest sister who decides to have a loud silverware dropping food session in the kitchen at midnight. AWESOME. It not only sounds like World War III in the kitchen, but now all the pets are up whining and bothering me too. Guess I AM not sleeping tonight. JERK
4. Boston, my favorite cat, will not stop sneezing. And he will not stop sneezing in my face at night, so his sneezes get all over me. I think he has allergies. But, Hubby doesn’t want to take him to the vet because we just spent a small fortune on Americus there. But he is my baby, and if he gets sick I get freaked out. SAD
5. It is ONLY Thursday and this week is not over yet. It is the longest week EVER and I still have to go to a 3 hour meeting on Friday afternoon (when my I-care-level is at 0 and I had a 4.5 hour meeting this past Monday. What is it with meetings? DUMB
6. I just want to know what we are doing….i.e. jobs, living situations, and real life. I am tired of being stuck in limbo-land. P.S. I have the patience the size of a small paper clip. DUMB
7. I planned on drinking last night, to make me nicer, however I found out we have close to no booze…ok, we just don’t have what I want. Which is a whole bottle of red wine (to myself) or crown with coke (the best thing to drink when you have to shovel snow—not that we are experiencing any snow, but it is the shoveler’s drink of choice). DUMB
8. I forgot to make my lunch last night and I am out of Ramen at work. DUMB
I think I need a vacation OR a really, really stiff drink.
This is the longest week EVER! I just want it to end!
This is so me….and then I am slapped back into reality.