Tag Archives: Sisters

My Sister, the Birthday Whore

middle

Yesterday was my sister, Sar’s, birthday and she was CRAZY. Why, you ask? Well let’s start the list:

1. She thinks everyone has to stop everything because it is HER day….ummm hello? Some people have to work.

2. She thinks she doesn’t get a day, but a whole month…..yea right. Everyone knows that only Christmas babies (AKA me) get a whole month to celebrate their birthdays!

3. She refuses to share birthday celebrations with her Hubby. We ALREADY had birthday bash this weekend…but it was for her Hubby, which means we have to have another birthday bash exclusively for her. CRAZY.

4. Lastly because I get these kinds of emails from her, while at work:

(Clearly, she is delusional and clearly she left off the list the BEST part: ALCOHOL)

So I wanted a healthy dinner tonight. – Chopped salad
Spinach salad
boiled eggs
peppers
cucumbers
cilantro
turkey bacon (i think we have some)
grapes
walnuts
Gorgonzola cheese – or the smoked Gouda chopped up in it.
olives
artichokes
rotisserie chicken – we should just buy and cut some of the flavorful chicken in the salad – yum
good salad dressing – I really want the cilantro dressing from trader joe’s – maybe i’ll run by and pick some up on my way home.
And anything else good you can think of to add
french bread with olive oil (we have the olive oil)

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Filed under family, Sisters, Uncategorized

One of those days…

Where I just want to knife myself, as my baby sis would say…..

Ugh.

ha-ha

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Filed under Life

What the Easter Bunny brought my sister

My sister, Middlechildadvice\’s Blog, got a super special surprise in her Easter Basket this past weekend……

puppy

Pretty cute, right?

He is a little vampire though. I forgot how much puppies like to bite! My toes, hair, and fingers are all sore!

I puppysat on Sunday and I am still recovering from it all….

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Filed under Pets

Sisterly Love

sisters

Rae: Do my homework!

Me: No

Rae: Write me a cover letter for work….puhlease?

Me: No

Rae: PUHHHHHH LEASE…

Me: What will you give me?

Rae: Whore.

Me: Slut.

Rae: I hate you.

Me: I hate you more.

Rae: DO IT

Me: Give me presents!

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A sister’s lesson

Rae, The Hostage, and I were watching a movie; when Rae and I decided that we were hungry.

Rae (to the Hostage): MAKE US DINNER.

Me (copying her): Make us dinner….

Hostage: NO! After the movie

we continued this pattern for about 5 minutes. For the purpose of this blog, I won’t repeat it for 5 minutes, but I wanted you to get a feel for how annoying us sisters’ can be….

Me (matter of factly): Rae, you don’t have a good grip on controlling this hostage. If he won’t do what we say, we are going to have to get a new slave. Learn how to control him or he won’t ever be useful!

Rae: Yea, I know…he doesn’t do what I say.

Me: Not a good sign, if the Hostage revolts.

Rae (more directly to the Hostage): Make me cookies NOW!

The Hostage: NO! I don’t want to.

I think the Hostage is going to have to be beaten…..

To Be Continued….

slave-chain

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Filed under lazy, Life

The Hostage: Update

hostage1

Update: The Hostage is in the kitchen cooking dinner. Too bad I am WAY too tired to eat it. But I will let you know how the rest of the week goes. He is already trying to revolt because I tried to pinch him….ok, well I just thought about pinching him, it required too much effort to walk into the kitchen to actually do it….eh.

At least he is doing his job, get in the kitchen HOSTAGE or I will kick you.

I had my Guinness. Time to sleep.

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Filed under Food, humor

The Hostage

hostage

Hubby will be away all week at a conference and I am taking a prisoner hostage.

Side Note: a little sadness, but I get the bed to myself. Just not sure who to torment yet…maybe Rae.

So, I told Rae we are hijacking her Boy to come cook for us all week. I told him under no certain terms that I don’t feel like eating cereal for the whole week, so we need someone to come and take care of us! Me and Rae WOULD REALLY eat cereal all week–chocolate chex to be exact.

The Boy better be scared, we want a home-made dinner on the table everynight! Hubby does not envy the Boy at all and told me I better not torment him since he has quasi-agreed to come over and make us dinners.

Poor Boy, stuck with the two non-cooking, lazy sisters…poor, poor Boy indeed.

I wonder if I can get him to do some housechores? Maybe I will leave him a chore list!  🙂

UPDATE: Hostage is in house now, sleeping. Rest up my pretty, because we are expecting a full course dinner tonight!

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Filed under humor