Tag Archives: work

July 15th: National Call in Sick Day

I CANNOT WAIT FOR JULY 15th!

Do you know what day that is? The day I will be calling in sick for this: WOO HOO

In case you could not already tell, I am a bit of a HP fanatic.

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x783i6_harry-potter-6-international-traile_shortfilms

Harry Potter here I come! And let the countdown begin.

(Note: Thanks Bookishpenguin for the date change!)

5 Comments

Filed under Harry Potter

One of those days…

Where I just want to knife myself, as my baby sis would say…..

Ugh.

ha-ha

3 Comments

Filed under Life

Traffic Madness Syndrome (TMS)

sign1

So, this morning I had to get up to drive to a different office. I dread going to this office because it is FAR. But, I had Britney going and I thought it wouldn’t be so bad, I even left the house 10 minutes earlier than I needed to. There I am driving along, and singing to Britney when I encounter it. 

THE.WORST.TRAFFIC.EVER.

And no, I am not exaggerating. I tried pinching myself, hoping I was in some kind of disasterous-traffic-induced nightmare. But, I was definately awake. The on-ramp to the highway I usually get on is closed. Thus explaining the huge disaster on the off ramp and side streets. I am stuck. There is no where else to go, except sit in the maddening traffic. Everyone is pissed, driving terribly, and honking on their horns. It was horrible. And that is when I started sweating.

There was no way to avoid it. I was getting TMS (traffic madness syndrome). Before I knew it, I had all the symptoms:

*shouting expletives

*full force anger

*tired, achey muscles from stamping on the breaks

*crabbiness

*lack ot control

*middle finger uncontrollableness

So, instead of taking me maybe 45 minutes to an hour to get here…it took me one hour and 25 minutes exactly!   At least it is Friday! I am scared to think how long it will take me to get home tonight. I have a feeling it is going to be a LOOOOONNNNNGGGGG day.

Stupid Traffic.

I definately have a case of full on TMS. I wonder if they make something for this? You know, some pill or something?  If so, I NEED it. Actually, I know just the thing that will help get me through the day…..

Lunch at Jersey Mike’s! I am starting to feel better already!

13 Comments

Filed under Commuting

Happy People and Me

Yea, so this isn’t really a surprise, but I am not a huge people person. But, you know what kind I can’t stand? The crazy, happy morning ones that are so chipper you just want to strangle them, yea you know what I am talking about, dontcha?   I think they are just plain psycho and they just plain annoy me. They stifle me with their quest for everlasting cheeriness. With that being said, one of my friends sent me the BEST.VIDEO.EVER. on those types of crazy people. And I am going to share it with you all because I think it will put a smile on your faces. So, enjoy it and next time you run into one of these types of crazy, happy people you will remember this amazing video!

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Filed under Challenges, Life

Why Hubbys’ Need Rules

It's amazing how I can always find the perfect google pic!

It's amazing how I can always find the perfect google pic!

Another long day at work done. WOO HOO.

As you can tell, after a long day at work…my genius brain is practically all used up. So in order to keep the spark alive, I try and woo Hubby, but alas it doesn’t work.

Me: Wanna smell my feet?

Hubby: No. Not really.

Me: The shoes I wore today really make them smell. In fact (as I lift my feet to my nose and grimace) they REALLY smell. Smell them!

Hubby: No

Me: Don’t you love me? It is part of your job, as a HUBBY, to do things that your wifey says, even if you don’t like them.

Hubby: No it isn’t.

Me: Yea it is! It is in the I-got-married-and-now-what rulebook. It defines the rules that Husbands have to perform in order to keep their cute wifeys!

Hubby: What about the rulebook for wifeys?

Me: There isn’t one. Wifey’s are perfect JUST.THE.WAY.THEY.ARE.

UPDATE: I succeeded in shoving my feet in Hubby’s face. He looked like he might vomit.

Hubby: Those feet smell HORRIBLE. GEEZ

Me: I even febreezed them!

Hubby: You febreezed your feet?

Me: Yea

Hubby: Are you sure you didn’t miss?

Ain’t love grand?

11 Comments

Filed under humor, marriage

Is it Friday, yet?

This is the longest week EVER! I just want it to end!

This is so me….and then I am slapped back into reality.

long-week

2 Comments

Filed under Life, work

How HARD is it?

 laziness

Another OH SO FUN Monday at work. Tell me why I have to deal with nutjobs? Please, tell me what I did….

So, I am sending out a link to a website to our committee members to review their stuff. Here’s my problem:

1. They wait til the last minute to review their materials, how do I know because I can tell when the stuff has been opened. (I looked at the link)

2. They then proceed to call me about an hour before the meeting, telling me they can’t “access the website” (PS I SENT THEM THE LINK and TESTED the link)

3. They tell me they can’t review their items because they can’t find where they are supposed to get those said items (PS I SENT THEM THE DIRECT LINK)

4. They email me telling me where they think the items they need to review “might” be located, but for some reason, they can’t find them (PS i sent them the link)

5. They tell me that they can’t find the email where I sent them the link (PS I sent them the link 3 times…..)

I give up….

6 Comments

Filed under I am a genius, work

Would you like a cup of PSYCHO with that?

 happy-people

Yesterday morning, a friend and I went to Starbucks to get some caffeine. After the crap that happened yesterday morning, I thought the jolt of caffeine could be useful. Little did I know what was awaiting me on the other side of the counter….but Mr. PSYCHO, WAY TOO HAPPY, Starbucks guy. Being the cynic that I am, I couldn’t help but ask him about his jolliness at this ungodly hour in the morning!

Starbucks Psycho Guy on Crack (WAAAAAAY To Chipper): Hey there! How are YOU guys? What can I get you? Isn’t it a BEAUTIFUL morning? What a WONDERFUL day!

Me (incredulous at his audacity to be happy): WHOA! You are way too happy right now! Do you chow down on coffee beans?

Starbucks Psycho Guy on Crack (smiling so big, I think he might pull a muscle): Oh No! I don’t even DRINK coffee!

Me (ready to jump the counter and kill him): BUT, you work at Starbucks! What time do you wake up and go to sleep at night?

Starbucks Psycho Guy on Crack: I go to bed at midnight and get up at 2:30am.

Friend: But that is like 2.5 hours of sleep.

Starbucks Psycho Guy on Crack : I know, life is just so grand! I am just so happy and blessed and I LOVE my job!

Me (LOUDLY): You are just WAY too happy.

Exiting Starbucks

Friend: Your smile, as he was talking, was so fake. I thought you were going to jump the counter and really strangle that guy!

Me: The thought DID cross my mind. I just hate happy people.

7 Comments

Filed under Crazies, work

Rules for Inflicting St. Patrick’s Day Pinches

pinching-hand

I have succeeded in pinching 4, 5, 6, 7 8 people so far, and it is still morning. And not just lightly either; they said I am not playing by the rules. BUT, I totally AM. After much searching and cross-examinination to find a rulebook for St. Patrick’s Day Pinching, I have decided to come up with a compilation of rules. Here is what I found:

Eat your hearts out, non-green wearers, for you WILL be pinched.

THE RULES

1.      Must be wearing green (in clothing) not on clothing. Green nail polish, green hair barrettes, and green stars are all examples of things that DO NOT count. Thus, you will be pinched.

2.      You are obligated to pinch someone not wearing green, if you don’t the leprechauns will not give you any luck and you will be miserable for the next ten years.

3.      Green MUST be visible, to not be pinched. (Green undergarments DO NOT count, unless you are willing to show them)

4.      Doesn’t matter if you don’t celebrate St. Patrick’s Day. You MUST wear green. Everyone else celebrates it, so you will be pinched, this is not a choice.

5.      The pincher has the right to pinch the non-green wearer as many times as he/she wants, however if you inadvertently pinch someone that IS wearing green (i.e. green must be in clothing—visibleness is key– green stars, barrettes, etc. DO NOT count, see Rule 1) than that person can pinch the inflictor back 10 times.

6.      Conspire with others to find out who you may have missed (pinching wise). Compare notes, go back and pinch the people you missed.

7.      Pinch hard enough to leave a bruise; that way the non green wearer will have a green bruise left from your pinch…thus they will then be wearing green.

8.      Take advantage of this day of abuse. Make sure to pinch people you really don’t like hard. This tactic might also keep them away from you in the future, especially at work.

9.      Tell everyone that is not wearing green that you are doing them a favor: wearing green hides you from the evil leprechauns. Trust me, you don’t want to run into one of THOSE. I am doing you a favor by pinching you….kinda like the cootie shot, only better!

10. Those that have the “secret card” are home free, put it in your wallet/purse and give it to those that try and pinch you. Do you have the secret card?

 

Well, hope this helps those of you that are mean like me see clarity in your pinching rights because it is important to know your rights as a pincher.

Happy Pinching, and hope you all have a good St. Patrick’s Day!

"secret card"

"secret card"

 

SOURCES: Wikipedia, Yahoo Answers, ask.com, Ken, and other miscellaneous websites.

7 Comments

Filed under holidays, humor

Work Quirks

working

I must confess, I am a people avoider. I shouldn’t have to explain much, other than the fact that I attract those with the KRZY vibe. That being said, I have to take precautions. Since some of you seem to be like me, I thought I would share my tactics because you never know what we can learn from each other. Feel free to share a couple of yours, if they are good ones. 🙂

How to Effectively Avoid People

1. I usually use the stairs. Stairs equal less people.

2. When I do use the elevator, I usually try and press the “door close” button right away. You don’t want to get stuck in the elevator with people and have to use small talk. Ugh that is a killer. Like I care what you did this weekend.

3. Sometimes I have to go hide in the bathroom. Just to get some peace.

4. Caller Id is the best thing ever invented. I swear, I wasn’t at my desk….

5. Uh huh. Yes, I agree. You are so right on that one! I can definately see your point. Are all phrases you should use when you want someone to think you agree with what they are saying. This, in the long term, gets them out of your office faster.

6. Find hiding spots for lunch, breaks and nap time. Otherwise, people will attack you during your break time with projects.

7. Sometimes it is ok to hide under your desk.

8. Being sick at work is a good thing because it keeps the masses away. Think of it like your own personal bug spray.

9. It is important to feign ignorance because you don’t want people to think you are too smart, they will only ask you to do more.

10. Pretending to use a cellphone is key. I pretend to check my voicemail in the elevator, when people get in. I pretend to use my cellphone at my desk. I pretend to use my cellphone wherever I go….that way, I appear busy, unavailable. This equals no time for small talk. Use it to your advantage.

5 Comments

Filed under humor, work