My Inner Trucker Lady

So, it isn’t like I have a problem or anything, but I noticed that so far this entire week I have guzzled no, eh downed, no drank some sort of liquor beverage every night. Not that there is anything wrong with that, right?

I have determined that work causes me to drink. But, that is a different story for a different day. So, I come home after a hard day of work and Hubby pours me a nice glass of Crown and Coke. Yea, I am a whiskey, beer, wine, you name it, I will drink it gal. Judge away.

I think I am totally cool downing my whiskey, that is until I get a text from a friend.

Friend: You drunk yet?

Me: No, but I am drinking coke and Crown.

Friend: You are so classy.

Me: Don’t be jealous

But, I am right? I mean, I am classy and lady-like. That is why Hubby likes me, right? (BELCH).

Or is it cause he thinks he will get lucky?

P.S. Hubby oftens suffers from spouts of delusion, especially when I have a drink in hand. (BRRPPP)

For a Limited Time Only…

I love Hubby because he takes me here:

And this is the first thing I see when I enter:

And he buys me many of these

And he doesn’t even bat an eylash when the bill is 100 dollars and the majority of the charges are beer!

And that is why I love him.

For a limited time only!

Expiration Date: Tomorrow

Good Times…

Here is the proof from our fun family New Year’s Eve get together. We made a little fondue, played a little Wii, and watched the Ball in Times Square drop. And some of us had a bit too much to drink, but what a way to ring in the New Year, right?! 🙂

Hubby with his booze...starting the New Year out right!

 

Making Fondue with a captive audience

Hubby and me with our booze

And the countdown to midnight begins….

Watching the ball drop...

Wait…where is Rae (AKA Pukey 1)

Reaching for that water glass...

Hmmmm bringing in the New Year is always fun in the bathroom!

Pukey 1

P.S. Rae might kill me for putting up these pics….but they teach a valuable lesson about pace and the value of food, plus I knew her boy would want to see them.

Happy New Years

Me at New Years…..

Hubby at New Years….well actually Hubby all year long….

Hope Everyone has a happy one!

Perfect Match

As of today, Hubby and I SHOULD have been in Texass (that is what I affectionately call it), however due to his evil job we are still here. (NOT WHERE I WANT TO BE). So, we are hoping to hit the road on Tuesday early morning to go visit his family for Christmas and my birthday. It is a 14 hour road trip, and yes, we are driving. I am not the best person to drive with because this is me, ARE.WE.THERE.YET????!!!! I know, you aren’t surprised, right. Plus, I usually have to go to the bathroom every 3 miles….yea, I am usually not allowed to have any beverages! I mean you know you have a problem, when our dog is better on these trips then me…..

However, today I am wondering why we AREN’T there yet……I am SO ready for a mini-vacation and break. We haven’t been anywhere fun in awhile and I need a break from my mundane life right now. Now, I am trying to get in the mood to go to work Monday, which I am CLEARLY NOT IN THE MOOD for. Because it was hard enought to be motivated on Friday, when I thought I was not coming back for awhile. I don’t know how I am going to get through tomorrow withought my flask….

On another note, Hubby and I were talking today and this is how we know we are a perfect match.

Hubby: I am trying to get in the Holiday Spirit, but I feel like such a grinch this holiday.

Me: I know, me too. And I NEED some booze to make me get in the HOLIDAY SPIRIT! We need to drink more Maker’s Cider.

Hubby: Do you think it is a bad thing, the amount of hard alcohol I have been devouring chugging consuming drinking lately?

(NOTE: His huge bottle of Maker’s is got maybe 2 shots worth left…and we just bought it in the beginning of December!)

Me: No, you need it and somedays I think I need the whole bottle too….

Hubby: That is how I know we are a perfect match!

Me: I know.

How to survive the holidays and family…

Rae just bought one of these bottles…..it helps her survive the family drama. Not only did she just buy a bottle, but she bought the biggest bottle you can buy.

MMMMMM mind numbing.

Here is another recipe to get you through the family holiday time (yes, I am reccommending drinking with family time):

Kentucky Mulled Cider

1 Cup Maker’s Mark Whisky
4 Cup Apple Cider
1 Lemon – sliced thin
6 cloves
1/2 tsp. Allspice (ground)
2 small cinnamon sticks

Combine Maker’s Mark and cider. Add 1 thinly sliced lemon with rind, cloves, allspice and sticks of cinnamon. Heat to boiling and serve

courtesy: Maker’s Mark Kentucky Bourbon Whisky

Try it! Good stuff! Everything is better with a little booze in you!

You know you need to be committed when…..

THANK GOD this week is over. I have been surrounded by crazy people all day and I cannot get away. I think I am becoming crazy, there is no hope. Crazy pets, crazy drivers, you name it I have seen it.

On my way home from work today, I am driving in bumper to bumper traffic, I am not kidding you. The guy behind me and I merge over, pretty much at the same time. He sticks his middle finger up at me (like I somehow read his mind and merged at the very same second, HELLO, there is a big fat semi in front of me…..DUH) So, what do I do? I stick my middle finger right back up at him. Yea, I am from Brooklyn, YO. So, then he sticks it back at me. Ok, fun…so I do it back. He motions for me to move over…I shake my head no at him while cointinuing the middle finger war game. He then– full speed ahead merges ON THE LEFT (mind you in an oncoming traffic lane) and proceeds to force me to slow down, or be mauled by his stupid yellow Nissan Pathfinder.

I now officially HATE Phoenix. Why are the crazies following me from state to state, and why oh WHY can’t I get away…..I think I need help. Or pills whatever. Luckily, Rae is readily prepared with the booze when I get home…maybe it won’t be a bad weekend after all……

BBQs, Apples To Apples and Drinking Don’t Mix

This weekend the hubby BBQ’d up a big brisket, and we had my sisters and her hubby over for a night of fun. As can be expected, we ate, we drank and were merry. However, some of us had too much to drink. J (Hint: not me)

We also played a game called Apples to Apples. For those of you that don’t know how to play this game, here’s what you do essentially:  You each draw seven red cards and then each person takes turns selecting a green card. The people without the green cards select a red card from their hand, which best describes the green card that was played. If the green card person likes your card, you win. Here is the interesting part: some people choose the strangest card , some choose the most likely card, some choose the dirtiest card, well you get my drift. Anyways, it is a pretty fun game, especially the more you drink!  And when playing with family, it can get pretty rowdy.

An Example from our night of fun:

The card being played is horny. We all submit cards the person with the green card is Sar.  I assume I am going to win with my card…”going to Grandma’s” because she usually picks the oddest one in the bunch. (Please don’t ask me why! At the time I didn’t have good cards in my hand). I just wanted to win.

She chooses raspberry. Her hubby wins!

Me: WHAT?! How can a raspberry win?

Her: Fruit can be a turn on! (this was said verbatim)

Her Hubby:  (TURNING BRIGHT RED COLORS.)

Me: I don’t want to know this!

Rae: I think I am going to puke! (Runs to Bathroom)

Me: HA HA me too.               

Sar: I think she is really puking!

Me: Oh, I thought she just broke the seal.

Rae: (Back) What is rubbing my foot?

My Hubby: Oops! I was playing footsies with you; I thought that was the dog!

Moral of Story:  Apples to Apples and Drinking don’t mix well…and for the BBQ….that part doesn’t come up so well, right Rae? J