My First Tacky Ornament Party

So, at work this week they have what you call a Tacky Ornament Party. I have never been to one before, and normally when I think tacky I think one of two things:

1. How tacky is tacky? DEFINE because I can probably get really tacky

2. I can always hit tacky, but probably also rub in how great the school I went to is compared to the arch enemy university I now work for…..you know, hit below the belt. I am just mean like that…

So, after struggling for some time, I came up with my first tacky ornament…it might not win any prize, but it does foster my love for my University of Arizona Wildcats! Poor Wilbur he is made out of a wine bottle ….

Wilber the Wildcat! Even Santa loves him!

Wilber from behind (note his A cape and his tail)

Well, there you have it folks….no worries, I won’t quit my day job, just yet!

Oh yea, and I offered to make Hubby one for his office at work too…you know to get him in the Tacky Ornament Spirit…but he turned me down…..guess he wasn’t impressed with my artistic skills! 😉

Burning Love Confessions

Me:  My butt burns.

Hubby: Why?

Me: I have had the squirts all day.

Hubby: You are so romantic.

Me: Don’t you love me?

Hubby: Of course, Squirts and all.

Then later, while lying in bed warm, comfortable and cozy.. a foul, smell wafts up to my nose (kind of like a mixture of raw sewer and bad eggs–I felt like you needed the analogy)

 Me: Did you fart? I smell farts!

Hubby (snickering): ummmm it wasn’t me….well, yea, I guess I did, but I thought the fart was trapped under the covers, I don’t know how it got out!

Me: OMG! Your butt is SO foul!

Hubby: Don’t you love me?

Me (SILENCE)

These are the things they don’t warn you about when you get married….farts and all. Just for the record…Hubby NEVER farted in the bed when we were dating.

What happened?